The process of making a decision

Today I attended Landmark forum, and listened to the introduction of their programme. They talked a lot about how the past experience could affect a person in making future judgments. There was also a talk about how to create and take options, take charge in our lives, and live with the consequences that we’ve made. In short, for us to live without regret.

How has past experienced affected my decision making capabilities? In the forum I heard people talking about how sour their relationship with their families. How they’ve had prejudice opinions to their partners; these opinions which are formed because of the past experience, then, act as a mental barrier between them. So whatever the other parties are trying to say, they can’t get the real message through. At that point, that was clear to me that a person’s past experiences can act as a hindrance for them when moving on to a new level of life. In my life, sometimes, this happens.

To realise that we have options, and to live the consequences from the options that we take, those are two statements that I’ve learned in the last couple of years. I am glad that there is a pool of people here in this small island that shares the same opinion as me. In this country, to tell people that they have options is rather hard to do.

I had numerous conversations with taxi driver, and I could only remember less than 5 taxi drivers that spoke highly of their lives. There was one taxi driver that I could not forget. He said he drove the taxi because he was bankrupt. He put a smile in his face when he said that. He told me, “Young man, I’ve lived a very meaningful life. I celebrated when I succeeded, and had no regrets when I failed”. I was impressed. If I become a taxi driver, I would like to tell my passenger my kind of story and put a smile in my face at the same time.
I was rather surprised that there were plenty of sharing in the forum. People are very open. They’re still friendly, even after the event. Again, that’s a rare quality in Singapore. One of the things I hate about the people here in general is that they’re somewhat reserved. There are these kinds of thoughts hanging in the air, “I don’t want to speak up if I don’t have a wonderful idea”, “I don’t know you, why should I share my things with you”, “Speaking out meaning I’ll be the center of attention. I don’t want to.”

I shared my piece of story last night with these people. From that piece of story, I told them that I’m in the middle of a junction of different decisions. In the end of the story, I thought I knew the answer already. But I know this early morning, my mind is not sure about the answer that I wanted to take. That makes me confused again. I throw a question back to myself, what do I really want in my life.
The process of making a decision is hard, not only in business world but also in real life. But what is easy is to live up with that decision. And that’s the art that I’m trying to master.

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